Welcome to Darkside Daily

When I'm not writing about my experiences in this journey called 'life', I'm singing and uploading my own interpretations of modern music. Click on "Cover Songs" to hear them, or on the YouTube logo on the right to see my YouTube channel.

Thursday, December 31, 2009

An Epic Year-End Post Of Epic Proportions

In typical fashion, I have left my epic year-end post for the very last possible moment. The truth is, as in most cases with me, I planned on writing this post all the way through December. If I remember right, my train of thought went something like this - "Yes, I will write an epic year-end post! It will be epic, with a capital 'eh', and it shall not only be epic but it shall ooh whats this, I have collapsed thanks to viral fever..."

What followed was several weeks filled with extremely negative thinking and semi-suicidal tendencies. As a result, the draft post which I typed in my mind (yes, I can actually do that) turned into a terribly serious, broody, morbid (and yet somehow epic) piece of negativity.

It has been a tough December, and that is an extremely apt way to end the year in my opinion. 2009 has been a disaster of - epic - proportions. I never intended my blog to be a diary but I find myself reading my posts from January to December this year. It started off with so much promise when I wrote "Restored" and I honestly believed that everything was going to look up from then on. Perhaps my rare venture into positive thinking jinxed it all.

I've never really talked about stuff that was personal to me on my blog, because quite frankly it's my business and no one else's. Still, such was the severity of the trials we went through that I suppose it was inevitable that it would affect my writing. That's why for me, "It's Too Late To Apologise", "Domestic Disturbance", "I Refuse", "A Time To Heal" and "I Could Use A Hand Right Now" are very important posts for me. It's not always obvious why, especially with the last post, but from a personal stand point the words reveal a lot more to me than they would to the casual reader.

Then there were more personal issues that I wrote about in "An Open Goodbye", "Disgust" and "Never Again". Reading those posts now can be somewhat embarrassing, as certain people continuously point out (yes, you know who you are!) but they still mean a lot to a person that is not used to expressing himself to others.

If I were to summarize 2009 in one word, it would be "bugger". If I were to summarize it in a phrase, it would be "bugger me sideways". I remember telling someone that I can't believe so much happened this year. I feel like some of the events were from 2008 and earlier, but no - all 2009. Yet I suppose it isn't new to look back at a year gone by and regret isn't it? In fact, I'm sure the blogosphere will be filled with angst-filled posts of how they misused 2009 and how horrible it was. Perhaps I'm just part of the crowd after all.

Haha. Right.

Halfway through the year I was convinced that this year would be remembered for friends lost, but then someone came into my life and brought an abundance of laughter, joy and just great companionship. Hardly what I'd call a small mercy, and now I end the year feeling a strange sense of gratitude instead of regret. The truth is, 2009 will always be a year which I will look back at and be proud of. Proud because despite everything that happened, here I am on the 31st of December, in good health, happy, at home, spending New Year's Eve with the family like I've done for 24 out of my 25 years on this earth, and alive in body and spirit.

So God bless everyone, and I wish all of you a fantastic New Year! I for one can't wait for it.



Friday, December 25, 2009

O Holy Night - Merry Christmas Everyone!

First of all, a very merry Christmas to all my readers! I hope you have had a wonderful holiday season (better than mine at least) and here's to rounding off the year 2009 on a positive note!

As promised, here is a headless video for the season. It's been exactly a year since I first put up a video, and that was "Away in a manger". This song is not as good as the others as I did it in a bit of a hurry, but I hope you all enjoy it either way.

Well I'm off for Christmas lunch! Once again, a wonderful Christmas to all!

To download the audio, just click here.

Thursday, December 24, 2009

December News, Flu's, And Birthday Blues

Greetings from the Darkside!

While most have been rejoicing over my recent leave of absence, there are a few (apparently) that are rather mystified by my sudden departure from blogging, as well as my recent tweets about hospitals and birthdays. For you handful, an explanation is due.

As most of you know, I have recently had the good fortune to find employment. It has been a rather hectic experience, filled with last minute participations in fund raisers, press conferences and factory tours. After about 3 weeks of this, we were finally transferred to Pannala to begin our 4 months of training.

While our mentors and superiors continuously stressed the importance of hard work at our positions, they never failed to mention the 'mad fun' we would have at Pannala, likening it to a revisit to our college days, filled with partying and no-holds-barred lifestyle. This was all a bit strange to me, since not only am I the lamest party animal on the face of the earth, but I didn't consider my college years to be a period of my life without responsibilities. So while most of my batch were salivating at the thought of continuous partying, I was not that enthused.

Perhaps I should have been though, because within 48 hours of landing in Pannala, I developed a 103C fever, collapsed in my lodging and was taken home at 3am the following day to be admitted in the hospital. The verdict was viral flu, along with dehydration and some other infection that the doctor couldn't quite diagnose. What followed was probably one of the worst experiences of my life: ten days of saline, constant fever, total weakness, vomiting plus being transferred between not two but three hospitals! Finally I was landed in the Kandy General Hospital, and let me just say that there were several nights I wished that I was connected to some form of life-support system, so that I could just unplug the blasted thing and end my misery. Dramatic? Perhaps. True? Completely. When I say that the toilet consisted of a rusted metal chair with a hole in it placed on top of a broken commode, well - go figure.

Yet, after ten days of an almost liquid-only diet and medication that seemed to be destroying my body in its attempt to fix it, finally my fever left me. The doctor, who made a rather poor show of pretending to know what he was doing with me, wasted no time in discharging me and washing his hands off me as soon as possible. Not that I was complaining; finally I was home! However, after two days of extreme exhaustion we realised all was not well and went to another doctor for some tests. Those tests came back showing that my kidneys had been affected by the virus, and that if I didn't get complete bed rest immediately I would have kidney failure. "Ah.", I said, and promptly found myself re-admitted in yet another hospital.

Luckily my 4th stint in hospital wasn't nearly as bad as my General Hospital experience, as my main complaint this time around was that of boredom. After several more blood and urine tests, it was decided that I would be discharged on the 23rd - my birthday. Now, I hardly attach much importance to such things as birthdays and other family traditions, but even I was rather depressed at the thought of spending my birthday in a hospital. Unfortunately, the doctor was adamant ("He has had 24 other birthdays at home no? Har har har...") and so my 25th birthday involved me being woken up by a nurse at 630am, and my first present was to be stabbed in the forearm for blood.

Still, it wasn't all bad. My parents and my ever-enthusiastic brother turned up with my presents which included some very funky ties and a Nikon digi-cam! It's not exactly a state of the art camera, in fact the internet reviews call it a "Facebook camera", but when compared to my medieval Sony Cybershot that has laboured to produce my headless videos, it was positively space-age!

In conclusion, I finally got home on the 23rd evening, and hopefully with another 3 days of total bed-rest my body should be at least 75% back to its former self. Still, the flu definitely has left its mark; I've lost 6kgs and all of the little muscle definition I had before the attack. Not that I had girls drooling over my physique, but it's quite a shame to have 9 months of work at the gym wiped out by 3 weeks of fever.

And so that has been my eventful December so far. Thanks to everyone that tried to get in touch with me and check up on me, and I apologise for not being able to reply to most of you. There shall be more posts before I head back to work, and perhaps even a headless video in the pipeline! Thanks for all the birthday wishes on Twitter as well, I was very touched.

Till next time, I wish everyone a very merry Christmas, and if I fail to blog before the 31st, I wish everyone a very happy new year as well!



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