Pool Side Poetry/Philosophy... And Jet Skis!

After much whining and complaining on my part, the family finally decided to flee the confines of our home and spend two days in Beruwela, seeing as the entire country was going on vacation anyway. What better way to relax and unwind after a stressful and unproductive couple of months than to soak up some sun down south? Some water sports, a few hours in the pool, the soothing sounds of the ocean, fine cuisine and air conditioned comfort - the perfect environment to be enlightened and rejuvenated! What could possibly go wrong?


Lots apparently. Just before leaving home, I asked the parents what time we were planning on leaving. "530am should be okay", they say. What?? Who wakes up at that ungodly hour to go on a holiday?? Miraculously, I stumbled out of bed at the required time, despite having only 2 hours of sleep under my (belt?). Blindly carry bags to jeep, collapse in back seat, and we're off!


Five hours, one "Don & Sons" breakfast, one stop at Abans for a frying pan (don't ask, for the life of me I cannot understand the urgency to buy kitchen utensils on the way to the beach) and several complaints of "are we there yet??" later, we turned up at the Riverina. Now, this was one of those carefully planned out vacations, unlike the usual lets-just-pick-a-place-and-a-hotel-and-go trips that my family usually goes on. Apparently there was a special offer during the 'festive season' (though the last time I checked, that was December) and we were now entitled to free non-motorised water sports as well as a 20% discount on the motorised water sports, plus a free lunch before our departure.


After our complimentary fruit cocktail and an awkward moment when my dad politely declined their offer to wash his car (they'd have had better luck offering to paint his toe nails), we checked into our rather comfortable rooms and had a quick lunch. The plan was simple: relax all afternoon and evening either on the beach or at the pool, jet ski the next day. I for one was looking forward to the pool more than the water sports - yes, I just wanted to laze around, sue me.


So it was no surprise that it started to rain just as I was about to get into my trunks. And not just a passing shower - no, it was that special torrential downpour that hits only when you need the sun the most.


Much to my annoyance, we now had no option but to sit on our king sized beds and watch what had to be the worst movie in the history of mankind ("Black Sheep"). I use the word 'watch' rather loosely though: it was more stare-at-tv-turn-to-each-other-shake-head-in-disbelief. Yes, day 1 was in a washout in every sense of the word, the only saving grace being the Foosball and table tennis with the brother.


On to day 2, and it started - early - in the form of getting a wake up call from mom at 7am. This is just not what I associated with this supposed holiday, though by now I was getting rather good at blindly brushing my teeth and getting ready. Stumble out of room (again), stumble to breakfast (again), and thank the heavens for holding back the rain! Not one to tempt the man upstairs though, I made a run for my trunks as soon as breakfast was done, and me and the bro hit the beach.


Now, if you've been reading this blog for a while, you'd know that I have absolutely no affinity to the so-called 'poetic writing' that is so prevalent in the blogosphere. I just don't seem to get it. Still, here I was at a beach, and if others could find some form of spiritual or mental 'epiphany' while observing the waves, surely I could to! I tried my best to channel some form of beach-induced poetic-aura, but all i could get was something along these lines:

Oh waves
Rolling in and out
Like
The ocean!
And
Oh how pretty
So pretty
(Err)
Washing over my soul like
The ocean!
You are my secret
Lover
Swimming like a fish in
The ocean!
.....
Salt in my wounds like sand in my shoes
(wait, that's a song by Dido. Dammit!)

Yes, as you can see, that didn't go too well. So instead I thought I'd try my hand at philosophical thinking.


Me [turning to floating head of brother]: Err...
Bro's Head: .... what?
Me: Oh did you see that coconut? In the water?
Bro: No.
Me: You know, a coconut could float in the ocean for hundreds of years before finally finding shore and then it would still, you know, like, work.
Bro: Shut up men..
Me: No, I'm serious, coco - [gets blindsided by wave]


After emerging spluttering and half choking from that little experiment, I decided to leave the clever thinking to those that have their thoughts more in order. Or have better companions.


The morning went by rather quickly, and soon we were on our way to the marina. In my mind's eye, I had pictured a proper 'marina' with power boats and yachts and people going diving and snorkeling and para-gliding and - well, you get the idea. So I was only slightly disappointed when we drove into a tiny cove that was about the size of a two car garage with a tiny single engine boat and a shack filled with life jackets that looked like they wouldn't save a flailing rodent, let alone a drowning man. At the hotel they told us to speak to the Captain and he'd tell us what was the best things to do etc. Well, the 'captain' turned out to be a sunburnt Lankan in a worn out diving suit with tinted waist length hair and an eyebrow ring. He looked more concerned with where his next joint was coming from rather than what to 'recommend' to us hapless 'sailors'.


"Jet Skis" I said firmly, and that was decided.


Half an hour later and I was thoroughly satisfied. I had been on quad bikes in Dubai, but this was a totally different experience altogether! Having 800cc's attached to your index would give anyone an adrenalin rush, and I definitely enjoyed myself.


Also, since certain people seemed to have a problem with me being headless all the time, I thought I'd post a proper picture.



And so ended our Beruwela vacation. All in all a rather 'fun' weekend, thought perhaps next time I should take the advice of my coastal counterparts and stick to the hills during the rainy season.