Check Check Check!

First of all, let me just say, the Darkside has reached India safely.

Secondly, what the hell?!

I've blogged about airport and other security before, but this just struck me as weird and I had to put it out there.

We know that air travel has become the most security filled exercise in the average person's life. The fact that you have to be there 3 hours before you have to fly is testament to that fact. Let's be honest, very few airports in the South East Asian subcontinent can boast of an airport that requires a 3 hour trek to get from one end to another. No, the time for check in is because of all the security checking, bag checking, ID checking, passport checking, visa checking, belt checking, drug checking, gender testing procedures that need to be done before allowing someone to get onto a plane.

But honestly, thanks to Osama's boys, I totally understand the paranoia. So I'm not going to complain so much about all the security and "oh-this-is-liquid-we-can't-allow-it-in-case-it-self-ignites-and-explodes" bull.

What I don't understand is, after putting us through all this nonsense, why do we have to be checked again after we land?!

Here I am, landing in the rather funky new Bangalore airport. Oh, I'm sorry, it's Bengaluru or something now - Bangalore was too colonial (talk about insecurity). Just when I think that they've outdone even our prized Colombo airport, I find a big line for the x-ray. Are you kidding me?? I need to be checked before I get OFF the plane as well?? Let's get this straight - in the minds of the Indian aiport officials, the terror suspects (me) are so devious and smart that they have somehow evaded all the security measures in the Colombo airport, snuck their lethal weapons (mp3 player) onto the plane, and then in yet another move of utter brilliance, decided to NOT blow the plane up/take plane hostage/set random people on fire, but rather sneak the device (mp3 player) OFF the plane as well!

And so, they set up the x-ray machine again. To catch me. If I was that dumb, then I should be arrested.

This reminds me off the time we went to Sweden. We went through the usual channels of security, and just before boarding the flight, we were confronted with a big white man. After a few seconds I noticed there was a little black man standing next to him, but he was almost invisible - such was the enormity (and whiteness) of his companion.

Just when I thought they were going to wish us a pleasant flight, they ask for my passport. Again?! Haven't we already done this?? But no, they were insistent. So we give our passports, and the little black man opens it to the visa page, and takes out a little magnifying glass and inspects the seal around our visa. After a few minutes scrutiny, he shows it to the abominable snowman, who grunts and allows us to pass.

Again, I am amazed. Instead of checking our visas at the emigration counter, they wait for us to get through all the other formalities, buy our duty free presents, remove our shoes and belts and nipple rings, and only THEN do they decide to check if our visa is legitimate or forged.


Someone explain this to me. Please. Anybody?


Next time I'm just taking the ferry.